instagram

There’s no mystical energy

The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers. I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I'm getting too old for this sort of thing. Kid, I've flown from one side of this galaxy to the other. I've seen a lot of strange stuff, but I've never seen anything to make me believe there's one all-powerful Force controlling everything. There's no mystical energy field that controls my destiny. It's all a lot of simple tricks and nonsense. Don't underestimate the Force. What?! I don't know what you're talking about. I am a member of the Imperial…

Read more

There’s only one man

He'll want to use your yacht, and I don't want this thing smelling like fish. I'm a monster. There's only one man I've ever called a coward, and that's Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I'm calling you is a television actor. No… but I'd like to be asked! Bad news. Andy Griffith turned us down. He didn't like his trailer. I hear the jury's still out on science. No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Bad news. Andy Griffith turned us down. He didn't like his trailer. First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn't date…

Read more

Andy Griffith

Bad news. Andy Griffith turned us down. He didn't like his trailer. First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn't date magicians. Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough. Really? Did nothing cancel? It's a hug, Michael. I'm hugging you. I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it. It's a hug, Michael. I'm hugging you. Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. Whoa, this guy's straight?

Read more

You drank it

I don't criticize you! And if you're worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. There's only one man I've ever called a coward, and that's Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I'm calling you is a television actor. I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it. Say goodbye to these, because it's the last time! I've opened a door here that I regret. Michael! I'm a monster. That's why you always leave a note!

Read more

Steve Holt

I’m a monster. I’m half machine. I’m a monster. What’s Spanish for “I know you speak English?” Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough.

Say goodbye to these, because it’s the last time! I don’t criticize you! And if you’re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. Across from where? There’s so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.

There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. It’s called ‘taking advantage.’ It’s what gets you ahead in life. Whoa, this guy’s straight?

First place

Across from where? I don't criticize you! And if you're worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. I'm a monster. Army had half a day. That's why you always leave a note! Not tricks, Michael, illusions. Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough. What's Spanish for "I know you speak English?" Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun.

Read more

Alliance and a traitor

Obi-Wan is here. The Force is with him. What good is a reward if you ain't around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain't my idea of courage. It's more like…suicide. Look, I can take you as far as Anchorhead. You can get a transport there to Mos Eisley or wherever you're going. You mean it controls your actions? I call it luck. You are a part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor! Take her away! But with the blast shield down, I can't even see! How am I supposed to fight? Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you. I want…

Read more

What good is a reward

The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers. I care. So, what do you think of her, Han? What!? Alderaan? I'm not going to Alderaan. I've got to go home. It's late, I'm in for it as it is. But with the blast shield down, I can't even see! How am I supposed to fight? What!? What!? Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you. In my experience, there is no such thing as luck.

Read more